things to do ( a personal reminder)

things i want to do:

1) re-memorize the map of Canada and all it's capital cities
( i had a thought today "what if, in random conversation, someone was to ask me where New Brunswick was or what the capital city of Newfoundland was?"

holy fuck.

as embarrassing as this is, i would honestly to resort to one thing, and one thing only if someone was to ask me this:

run. ( after silently farting, of course) ( mostly to teach them a lesson for asking me ridiculously hard questions they KNOW i can't answer)

2)re-evaluate whether i shold flush the toilet everytime because apparently the bacteria in pee just grows to crazy amounts when it sits in the bowl, and then when the next person flushes, it splashes up ever so slightly, infecting the person with your mass amounts of urinal bacteria....

which sounds like bollocks. mabye only if it splashes directly into your asshole (anus) or urethra (boy or girl forms)

so..... forget that one.

and 3) sleep more.


goodnight.

stains make me sureally sublime

....... i feel i am slowly flooding with this
crazy creative cacophony of carefully calibrated crafty chaos !!!

here are the things i am getting up to:

1) staining possibly very wood surface i own.
you never realize how different a stain can make things. the whole shadow and light and a bunch of other stuff changes.
( "a bunch of other stuff " - things i have yet to categorize into the english language)

2) randomly mosaic-ing every other surface that i dont stain.... which, i think, is a lot harder than i think it is. mortar, tiles, grout, love, time, space, goggles (only for the smashing part)
(imagine if we spelled smash like this: smaxsh)

3) collecting picture frames to assemble together and hang from the ceiling to separate the kitchen from the living room... that was one of jeanie's ideas and im just running with it.

4) eating fruit loops and then spitting them out onto canvas and covering with a thick coat of polyurethane sealant.

5) that last one was a lie

6) other things!!!!!

If you are ever bored with space and time- watch this!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJzU3NjDikY

HAPPY STAINING, JILL!!!

TOO MUCH TOO MUCH TOO MUCH
JOY IS UPON
ME...

life totally rules and here is why:

- jeanie and i have found the most wonderful, cozy, warm and sweet home ever.
we looked and looked and looked our faces off
- the river valley made me burst into tears yesterday morning
(small, cute, joy-filled tears that tasted so sweetly)
- i have realized why some "at-the-time" negative events have happened
i am growing and learning and opening up because of them
(isn't it awesome when things just make sense? and i mean in a ridiculously deep spiritual way that is so personal, yet universal, but the only who really sees how beautiful it is is you?)
(yeah, that kind of feeling....)
- i am prepared to get crafty and artsy and really take risks and try new things and fail, and succeed and discover and express, like a bunny on its first adventure to find lettuce!!

LIFE is totally impressing me and i think it's because i know its an impressive thing!
i am seeing around the corners and finding all this freakin' beauty everywhere, and thats why i have these tears.

i am so happy.

i've decided that i have a new obsession.
his name is richard brautigan.
he writes some of the best stuff that hits me right here.

this is one of my faves, even though i hate choosing favorites and will never do it to small archaic-looking bugs, this is my favorite for now...

December 30th

at 1:30 in the morning a fart
smells like a marriage between
an avacado and a fish head

i have to get out of bed
to write this down without
my glasses on
-RB

and this one:

fuck me like fried potatoes

fuck me like fried potatoes
on the most beautifully hungry
morning of my God-damn life.

-RB

GOODNIGHT RECTUM!!

Armadillo Super Mario Bros Madness!!!

after the chez lounge and the cherokee indian man separated, i never was the same.
they grew so close to me.

but, in other news on another galaxy farfar away from here...

i had to give a talk about the armadillo today, yes today, at the zoo. she had bright red blood on her toes and tail and oh my dear, i thought her heart was seeping out through her veins...
but she was only getting her period.
her period? yes, her period.
she was bleeding from her loiny womb.
her moon cycle was in tune with the full moon...

and her vagina genitalia-lia was growing red....

right anyways, you GOTTA check this shit out. maybe you've seen it, or something similar, but THINK AGAIN!!
My friend jeanie is right, japan does rule.

today was a great day i was not excited for. but all in all, i realized (now at 10pm) that it was great.
looked for houses to rent with jeanie and i think we're onto something.
out intuition is sharp
and our minds are smelly
so..
this is going to be great.

i really like this picture and
i thought i would put it up and then
go to the bathroom.

how cool is she??

ass to ass

first blog

i've decided that writing a blog is a good move to make.

• i can type faster than ever before, causing minimal moments of levitation (which is better than no moments of levitation)
• i can write about poop and other such delights
• having a computer screen in front of me constantly is like one of the top things you can do
• and.... i get to talk about poop, more.

and that is all.
a-thank you.